When people think about pregnancy loss, they often imagine the emotional pain of saying goodbye to a baby. What is much less known is that, after around 16 weeks of gestation, many mothers also experience another unexpected reality, their bodies begin producing breast milk, even though there is no baby to feed.
During pregnancy, hormonal changes prepare the breasts for lactation. These physiological processes continue even after the death of a baby, meaning that milk often comes in two to five days after birth. For many bereaved mothers, this can be a profound shock, especially if nobody has warned them that it may happen. Research shows that the lack of information about lactation after stillbirth or infant loss can intensify grief and leave parents feeling isolated and unprepared.
Beyond the emotional impact, unmanaged lactation can cause painful breast engorgement, milk leakage, and even complications such as mastitis. Yet, despite these physical and emotional challenges, conversations about lactation after pregnancy loss remain uncommon in many healthcare settings.
Importantly, there is no single “right” way to respond. Some mothers choose to gradually suppress lactation, while others find comfort in expressing milk for a period of time or even donating it to a human milk bank, transforming an unimaginable loss into a life-saving gift for vulnerable newborns. What matters is that every bereaved mother receives compassionate, evidence-based information and is empowered to make the choice that feels right for her.
Breaking the silence around lactation after pregnancy loss is an essential step towards improving bereavement care. No mother should have to discover this hidden reality alone.
Some resources:
Empty Arms Bereavement Support. Lactation after Loss: A Guide for Bereaved Mothers. https://www.emptyarmsbereavement.org/lactation-after-loss-resources
La Leche League USA. Lactation After Loss.
https://llli.org/news/commonly-asked-questions-about-lactation-after-loss
La Leche League International. Commonly Asked Questions about Lactation after Loss. https://llli.org/news/commonly-asked-questions-about-lactation-after-loss/
Serra Húnter Fellow of Sociology at Universitat Rovira i Virgili.
Former DAAD-Gastprofessorin at Julius-Maximilians-Universität Würzburg