International Day of Unwanted Loneliness
Loneliness is a distressing feeling accompanying the perception that the quality and/or quantity of one’s social connections is inadequate. Loneliness is not the same as social isolation; a person can have many social connections and still experience loneliness; conversely, a person might have a very small social circle and be entirely content with that as it meets their social connection needs.
Loneliness has often been considered as an issue for older adults; for example, our social participation can decline in older adulthood as our health and mobility decline, and this can contribute to loneliness. We also lose some of our social connections through retirement, and bereavement. However, the EU Loneliness Survey, and others, indicate that loneliness is highest in young adulthood.
Why might this be? Young or “emerging” adulthood, from about 18 to 25 years, is a time of considerable change. There are several life transitions that disrupt our established social relationships and socialization patterns.
Our research with emerging adults indicates that loneliness is a very common experience, and often this is a transient experience linked to life transitions – like the transitions from education to the workforce, or living with the nuclear family to living with unfamiliar housemates. However, because young adults are not typically expected to feel loneliness, it can be more difficult for them to talk about, and they can feel very alone in their loneliness. This is why a public understanding that anyone can experience loneliness, and that it is quite common during young adulthood, is important – it affects how people experience loneliness and their readiness to talk about it and tackle it. Importantly, although occasional and mild loneliness is common, and may resolve without any particular intervention, chronic or intense feelings of loneliness can contribute to the development of mental health challenges later.
What can we do about this problem?
Recognise that loneliness is something anyone can experience.
If you do feel lonely, this is common and is not something to be embarrassed or ashamed about.
Reaching out to the social connections you do have, or identifying opportunities to join new groups or activities, can help with loneliness.
Finally, it’s important not to leave the burden of solving loneliness entirely to those people experiencing it. Being open to connecting with others in your community, even in some small way, might make a big difference to others experiencing loneliness.
Associate Professor in Psychology at the University of Limerick, Ireland. Her research explores dimensions of social relationships and how these influence our health, particularly in terms of coping with stress. She is also interested in open science methodologies and public engagement with psychological science.